My friend Dave is a Methodist pastor and a member of my writing group. He asked our group for input about why they do or don't go to church.

Thinking about it, and reading other folk's responses, i realize i don't have the huge negative response to "Church" that some people have, yet i'm not a consistent church goer either.

Since i sometimes go to church, Dave's question makes me wonder what defines "church." As a pastor, is his question, "have you joined ONE church and stayed with it?"... read more

ME: Jesus! What happened to the living room?

CAT: I'm crazy!

ME: I'm a failure as a writer.

CAT: Pet me.

ME: Everything i write is trite cliché crap!

CAT: Pet me.

ME: And my God, look at all these comma splices!

CAT: Pet me.

ME: ...

ME: Maybe i should become an accountant.

CAT: Pet me.

CAT: I want to drink from the faucet.

ME: You have a water bowl right over here.

CAT: I want the faucet.

ME: Your water bowl has a pump in it, just like the faucet.

CAT: I want to drink out of the faucet!

ME: Look, i'm tapping the bowl.

CAT: I want the faucet.

ME: No! Just drink out of the damn bowl.

CAT: Faucet!

CAT: I want to come in the window over your computer, where you are working.

ME: No, honey. You have a cat door.

CAT: I want to come in your window.

ME: Look, no more window. I'm setting a boundary.

CAT: I want to come in your window!

ME: I'm not listening.

CAT: Window!

ME: Ugh! All right!